Saturday, September 02, 2006

An Ethical Dilemma

I hate Tennessee. I think it is a combination of their obnoxious fans (I know that is redundant; by definition, Tennessee fans are obnoxious), Rocky Top (they play it 400 times during the pre-game alone), Phil Fulmer (skunk who believes that if you can't beat them then tattle; if you don't believe that there are some recruiting violations going on at Tennessee just like those at Alabama, you are naive and probably an obnoxious Tennessee fan), and the color orange (nobody in the world looks good in that color).

That being said, I find myself cheering for them this evening. They are playing Cal, who I also happen to hate. I think they are perennially overrated and that the PAC-10, with the exception of USC, can't hold a candle to the SEC (it is not hard to go undefeated when you don't play a real opponent until the bowl game in January). My hatred for the PAC-10 appears to outrank my hatred for Tennessee. I feel pretty dirty right now. I am quietly rooting for my least favorite team just so I don't have to hear the ridiculous commentators discuss how a loss by Tennessee proves that the SEC is having a down year and is not as good as the PAC-10. So I am stuck with the ethical dilemma that I want both teams to lose but find myself rooting for Tennessee nonetheless. I think I am going to hope that Tennessee blows out Cal and then proceeds to lose every SEC game this year. That would prove that Tennessee sucks, Cal sucks worse, and the PAC-10 as a conference sucks. I may have to take a bath after every quarter and spend all day tomorrow in church repenting, but just for tonight I am saying Go Tennes... Go Ten... Never mind. Lose, Cal, lose!!!


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